Saturday, July 20, 2013

Kink of the Week: Flogging

Kink of the Week


So…have you been flogged, or flogged someone else? What do you think of it?
Is it an actual kink of yours – do you need it, want it, crave it? – or just something that you enjoy when it happens?
Is it used a a precursor to other kinds of play – a warm-up? Or is it an activity you enjoy in and of itself?
Are there certain types of floggers that you love (or love to hate?) A certain place to be flogged on your body, or a certain method that you like to flog someone?
What is it about flogging that “gets” you – or doesn’t?

Flogging is the way I popped my BDSM cherry. Sure I had been spanked and what not before but as far as what I felt to be actual D/s play or scening, flogging was it for me. This was with Sir Phryxus, and not long later with Mistress Fenreya at my first bondage club night.

I learned that I enjoy a steady, thumpy flogger with some weight to it. I enjoy being flogged on my upper back but really like to be flogged on my ass and thighs and in between.

When I am flogging, I tend to vary the impact between a variety of toys and floggers from a soft fuzzy flogger to a stingy paddle to a thumpy flogger to my hand and so on. This way I can spread the sensations out.

Flogging is one of mine and Sir's most participated fetishes and because of this we have more floggers than any other toys.

 Above is a flogger Sir Phryxus made one evening with strips of old leather he had laying in the shop.
ToolWorks Chicago Inc. floggers for Sir Phryxus and myself
My custom made Pink and Purple Loliflog

Thursday, July 4, 2013

Kink of the Week: Marks

The Kink of the Week

This week we are talking about marks – specifically the marks left on your body – or the body of one you have been playing with – after you have been playing.

how do you feel about getting or giving marks? Do you treasure them, or can you take or leave them? Are the marks you get (or give) part of your kink, and have some deeper meaning, or just an outcome of what you do?

Or perhaps marks are something to be avoided or hidden, or that cause embarrassment. Or maybe you just don’t like them.

Do you consider yourself a “marks fetishist”?  Do you desire them, negotiate for scenes that will cause them, or are maybe even feel disappointed if you don’t get (or give) them? Are getting or causing marks, or the sight of marks on your body or the body of the person you play with, arousing to you?

Are marks sexy? Are they a badge of honor? Do you poke at them, sigh over them, look at them in the mirror, maybe even take pictures of them?

What about those of you with multiple relationships or play partners? Does that affect whether you give or get marks, or how, when or where?

Marks, for me, are fun, but are by no means "the point" of our play nor am I a marks fetishist. I can take em or leave em when it comes to play. When a submissive asks me for marks, I am always cautious and make sure they are sure and on placement - do they have to go to work? what sort of clothes will they be wearing after this? will they be going to a tanning bed in the near future? etc.

As for marking me and being poly. Our rule is that my husband can mark me as territory - usually a bite or hickey on the neck or breasts. Only a few of my past partners have been able to to do the same due to my desires or his.

As for marking people in other ways
Sir Phryxus loves the look of rope marks and I find them appealing as well:

before anyone gets up in arms (haha punny)
those red marks are not blood blisters, they were there prior to tying

harder to see this one sadly
And then there are the kinds of marks left by toys like a cupping set

And then there are marks left by knives like those mentioned in a previous KOTW post on Knife Play

Marks can be a lot of fun and I recommend playing around with it as long as you're sure of placement and who do you want to be able to see them?